Monday, December 29, 2008

A Thank You Note

Dear Cousin Stacey,
A big sarcastic thank you for leaving your magic thigh growing homemade Christmas cookies at my house after our family party. Because of my thighs secret plot to take over the world they will not get wasted.
Can't stop eating them at 11 pm,

Thursday, November 13, 2008

What You've Been Waiting For

The people have spoken and I will deliver. I have been putting off posting pictures of the house cause....well, cause I wanted to take you though each agonizing step. See the studs, the dry wall, the windows, the porch....and I have the photos I just still need to edit them, and put them in order. Maybe someday I'll put one of those fancy side bar slideshow of the whole build job. I have been needing to take down that poll I put up a bunch of months ago on how often you all make your bed. Can I just say that after analyzing all that data I have come to the conclusion that you are all a bunch of liars. Anyway onto your demands. The house. K here she is. 
Well just the outside. I 'll take you in soon. Just let me get a few more of these cardboard boxes out of the way. 

Friday, November 07, 2008

Almost Home

The house is ...... finished. Our house. The home that we will live in for ..... forever. Tomorrow Mikey, (builder/brother-in-law) is having an open house. Then after that it is all mine! As you can imagine the next few weeks will be hectic. And I am real sorry I don't have pictures for you today. Soon. I promise. Better yet come see the place tomorrow. 
PS It is beyond fantastic. 

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Picture This

A few Wednesdays ago, I had an over-scheduled day. I had booked myself with appointments, birthday dinner, Tobin's pre-school, taekwondo, and I was teaching Bible Study and speaking at our evening MOPS group at the same time. The hardest part of the whole day is just getting out the door [on time] in the morning. Trying to anticipate what everyone might need though out the day. Sippy cups, snacks, diapers, extra clothes, small toys, Tobin's show-and-tell and lunch, purse, cash, keys, lip gloss, extra barrette, and a partridge in a pear tree.
That morning while getting the kids dressed, I had no clean jeans for Tobin. Only shorts and it was a blistery fall day so shorts wouldn't do. I dug real deep and found a pair of overalls. Now overalls are perfect when you're two or eighty-two but not five. Tobin is a tall kid for his age and these overalls just plain look silly on him. They barely cover his ankles and kinda ride up his crack a bit....can you picture this?
But really I had no choice so I thought I'd just go all out and pick out a bright yellow John Deere shirt and call the whole thing a farm boy theme day. I knew his teachers would smile and think, "awe Tobin dressed himself today, how sweet." I took a long look at Tobin as we were leaving the house. This lanky kid in Dennis the Mennis overalls and uncombed hair with breakfast on his face and said a little prayer that the other kids wouldn't tease him.
My day flew and finally it was time to pick up Tobin from school. I was happy to see that he looked like he had a great day. When he jumped in the car he announced, "Guess what mom, Today was PICTURE DAY!"

Just another reason why I need to started writing things down in a date book.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

I'm back

I have taken quite a hiatus from posting. I've never wanted my blog to be a place of guilt over not writing and lately I have just simply had too much on my plate. But I must write again because my kids are getting older everyday and Tobin has given me too much material to sit on and I must share it with the internet and future high school girlfriend.
I don't have time to write much today but I wanted to show you the picture that I just can't stop looking at.

Age: Barely Two.

I see me, shrunk in a dryer. Kidding. She does look a lot like me but I truly do know that she holds so many mysteries. I am really looking forward to getting to know her better. What do you see when you look at it?

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Super Mom

I have hi-jacked Becca's blog to publicly announce how much of a super mom and wife she is!   I had surgery on Wednesday and have been unable to care for myself, let alone help out with the kids much.  I have seen first hand these past few days something I think I already knew, but never really saw up close or appreciated, my wife is such an amazing woman!  I thought my job was hard, I mean I really thought my job was hard, but it's a freekin cake walk compared to the shananigans I've seen these kids pull these past few days, which I'm told are common practice.  Becca is full of love, grace, patience and compassion for her family, I feel so honored to be her husband and for her to be the mother of our children.  I'm somewhat speachless on how she deals with the screaming, the whining, the begging, the throwing of food, toys, and each-other.  She always comes into the room with a smile and asks me if she can get me anything and apologizes for the noise.  There's just so much chaos, biting, crying and pooping, I just don't think I can take it anymore, but somehow, becca fights back with a smile, a soft comforting voice, stern discipline when necessary and even a laugh or two.  I've decided to put her in for a Super Mom blog award!  I felt compelled to write this to let you all know what you all probably already knew, my wife's a stud, and she's hot!  I know some of the guys are going to make fun of me when they read this, they're thinking that I'm just trying to suck up to get some more action or something, I know how you guys think!  Anyway, that's it, love you babe!

Saturday, August 09, 2008

Bring Your Babe To Work Day

Lucky you that I brought my trusty pocket camera with me to one of Matt's SWAT training days. I got to drive with Matt in this monster of a vehicle to an area of town that has all these abandoned buildings. The team uses them to practice realistic scenarios of crime and general unpleasantness that our society can bring. These building are really really gross. Lots of broken glass, rodent droppings, and graffiti. Oh and did I mention that it was smelly and the whole time I was hoping that my tetanus shot was updated? I was so exciting spending the day with Matt at work and watching the process that this brotherhood of men have perfected to ensure their safety and ours. They really do move together like a synchronized ballet. A ballet with automatic weapons. I even shot some video but Matt said I couldn't post them on the (high) chance that some drug dealer reads Glory Laine and is taking notes on the SWAT teams tactics using their secrets for evil and not good. I complied but am sad. Maybe if you all protest in the comment section he'll give in to your deepest wishes and forsake his safety for our enjoyment. (Can't hurt to try.) Anyway on to my pictures......
They don't look so tough carrying their baby dolls, do they.

Check out this sniper. He was all comfy in his position until I pointed out that he was laying on an ant hill. Boy those SWAT boys can move fast. This one is cuUte.Other SWAT babes.OK so I warned you these building were gross, right? They have been inhabited by run-a-ways, drug users and well, people who don't spell well. In case you don't speak jive, sNIfer is a major insult. This is Jet. He is an amazing animal. I was so impressed with all the OO7 technology that these guys use. This is a camera that looks like a gun. It captures images in rooms without having to send an officer in. They also had these round rolling camera that they can throw down a dark hallway or room. They call them (ahem) SWAT balls.

I know I look like I could do some damage with this bad boy. But in reality it took one of the guys five minuets to position each of my fingers so that I could play off this picture. I'm a lover not a fighter.

Tuesday, August 05, 2008


I know, I know all of you tens of readers have been waiting for house pictures. Well here are a few more. Please note that it's much further along now. In fact it should be all framed tomorrow! Walking tour to come.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Give It To Me Straight

Do you think Tobin could be the next Tiger Woods?

On the fence about it? How about looking at another swing.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Locked Out

Today I got locked out of our house. Now that in it's self is bad, but what made it worse is ...

a. I had all three kids with me. That morning I had dragged the twins to Bridgeport Plaza to show my mom this open air mall. They didn't nap so I was eager to get them into bed so I could survive the evening.

b. It was 96 degrees outside

c. I had to pee

I was sure that Matt would be home any minuet so I waited. and waited. AND waited. I kept the Twins in their car seats watching a movie with the air conditioning on. I was really feeling guilty about leaving the car running with gas prices costing more than a Starbucks per gallon. I decided that I would see how long I could turn off the car, roll down the windows and run the battery, (I had to keep the battery on so the movie would keep playing. I'm not a masochist.). As soon as I did, I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my face and I fought to not turn on the AC. I started thinking of Matt's best friend Coop who is serving in Afghanistan. His last email said that some days the temperature hits 120 degrees. AND lets not forget that he is wearing all his gear oh and he's getting shot at. So where was I? Oh yeah fighting my own war in the car. I think I lasted all of five minuets when I turned the key and started waisting gas again....remembering why I didn't join the military.

When I realized that Matt was not able to rush to my rescue, because he was arresting a suspect for strangling his wife, I decided to get productive. I really wished I could read my book that I am in the middle of, but alas it was locked inside the cool house along with the toilet and babies cribs. So Roscoe, my Jack Russell, and I had a talk. I tried to convince him that he could retrieve my book and bring it to me via the dogie door. (Don't laugh! I've heard of dogs that rescue babies from fires and smell cancer in their owners. My dog might be special too.) I went into a description of what the book looked like and were it was on the night stand. He looked at me amused. I then reminded him of the fifteen hundred dollars that I had just spent on him after he stupidly ran in front of a car chasing a squirrel a month ago (he actually caught one of the cute fluffy vermon the other day see photo below). Surely he could do this insey wencey task. That's when I heard the first dog laugh out loud ever.

So because I couldn't read, I cleaned the van. And after that I played Tetris on my phone. An hour later Matt came home and now all is well. Matt immediately had to leave to take Tobin to see WALL-E, they had a date. My training with Roscoe will continue, my next step is to teach him that what he kills needs to stay out of my house. I don't want to see anymore dead squirrels on our basement steps. But my discouragement is useless when Matt comes to Roscoes aid and demands that I take trophey pictures of Roscoes kill.


Really, really disgusting stuff....I know.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

The I-don't-need-the-stress-of-a-birthday-party Post

I had a vision for the twins' second birthday party before they were born. When I can't sleep at night, I plan parties. It's cheaper then sleeping drugs but just as addictive. If I were to have two boys I decided to do a train themed birthday. The invitations would have steam coming out of the smoke stack saying, "Two, Two". For two girls I was going to have a ballerina "two two" (tutu) party. Boy girl twins was a harder theme to come up with. I decided on Noah's Arc, two by two. But on account that I have no home and we were leaving on a vacation the next morning I decided that a big party with a theme was mommy suicide. Instead we had a lovely day at Enchanted Forest. This hilly silly park was just perfect for giving the twins a fun celebration in honor of them and us surviving for two years.
We all headed to Red Robin for dinner and complimentary ice cream sundaes.

Rest up little girl, two is going to be hard.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Two X Two

What is it about your child's birthday that takes you right back to the day they were born?I know you've seen all the current Jabe and Phoebe pictures, so today I thought I'd show you a few from the day they were born.

The Oven

There have been many blessing that have come out of my infertility. Life lessons, patience in waiting, a strength in my marriage, but by far the best gift has been the raising of twins. I would have never, ever wished twins on myself. I mean the whole idea is rather absurd. These two have brought me so much joy. The kind of joy that makes me miss them when they are sleeping and happy to greet them in the morning.  
Happy Birthday Jabe and Phoebe. You and your big brother made all those years of sadness melt away. And you guys taught me that even the most scary task of having two newborns in the house...... wasn't so bad after all. 

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Botox Gone Bad

Why babies and Botox don't mix.
I came across this picture of Jabe just minuets after delivery. Made me laugh.