Bring Your Babe To Work Day

Lucky you that I brought my trusty pocket camera with me to one of Matt's SWAT training days. I got to drive with Matt in this monster of a vehicle to an area of town that has all these abandoned buildings. The team uses them to practice realistic scenarios of crime and general unpleasantness that our society can bring. These building are really really gross. Lots of broken glass, rodent droppings, and graffiti. Oh and did I mention that it was smelly and the whole time I was hoping that my tetanus shot was updated? I was so exciting spending the day with Matt at work and watching the process that this brotherhood of men have perfected to ensure their safety and ours. They really do move together like a synchronized ballet. A ballet with automatic weapons. I even shot some video but Matt said I couldn't post them on the (high) chance that some drug dealer reads Glory Laine and is taking notes on the SWAT teams tactics using their secrets for evil and not good. I complied but am sad. Maybe if you all protest in the comment section he'll give in to your deepest wishes and forsake his safety for our enjoyment. (Can't hurt to try.) Anyway on to my pictures......

They don't look so tough carrying their baby dolls, do they.

Check out this sniper. He was all comfy in his position until I pointed out that he was laying on an ant hill. Boy those SWAT boys can move fast. This one is cuUte.Other SWAT babes.OK so I warned you these building were gross, right? They have been inhabited by run-a-ways, drug users and well, people who don't spell well. In case you don't speak jive, sNIfer is a major insult. This is Jet. He is an amazing animal. I was so impressed with all the OO7 technology that these guys use. This is a camera that looks like a gun. It captures images in rooms without having to send an officer in. They also had these round rolling camera that they can throw down a dark hallway or room. They call them (ahem) SWAT balls.

I know I look like I could do some damage with this bad boy. But in reality it took one of the guys five minuets to position each of my fingers so that I could play off this picture. I'm a lover not a fighter.

Framed

I know, I know all of you tens of readers have been waiting for house pictures. Well here are a few more. Please note that it's much further along now. In fact it should be all framed tomorrow! Walking tour to come.

Give It To Me Straight

Do you think Tobin could be the next Tiger Woods?

On the fence about it? How about looking at another swing.

Locked Out

Today I got locked out of our house. Now that in it's self is bad, but what made it worse is ...


a. I had all three kids with me. That morning I had dragged the twins to Bridgeport Plaza to show my mom this open air mall. They didn't nap so I was eager to get them into bed so I could survive the evening.


b. It was 96 degrees outside


c. I had to pee





I was sure that Matt would be home any minuet so I waited. and waited. AND waited. I kept the Twins in their car seats watching a movie with the air conditioning on. I was really feeling guilty about leaving the car running with gas prices costing more than a Starbucks per gallon. I decided that I would see how long I could turn off the car, roll down the windows and run the battery, (I had to keep the battery on so the movie would keep playing. I'm not a masochist.). As soon as I did, I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my face and I fought to not turn on the AC. I started thinking of Matt's best friend Coop who is serving in Afghanistan. His last email said that some days the temperature hits 120 degrees. AND lets not forget that he is wearing all his gear oh and he's getting shot at. So where was I? Oh yeah fighting my own war in the car. I think I lasted all of five minuets when I turned the key and started waisting gas again....remembering why I didn't join the military.





When I realized that Matt was not able to rush to my rescue, because he was arresting a suspect for strangling his wife, I decided to get productive. I really wished I could read my book that I am in the middle of, but alas it was locked inside the cool house along with the toilet and babies cribs. So Roscoe, my Jack Russell, and I had a talk. I tried to convince him that he could retrieve my book and bring it to me via the dogie door. (Don't laugh! I've heard of dogs that rescue babies from fires and smell cancer in their owners. My dog might be special too.) I went into a description of what the book looked like and were it was on the night stand. He looked at me amused. I then reminded him of the fifteen hundred dollars that I had just spent on him after he stupidly ran in front of a car chasing a squirrel a month ago (he actually caught one of the cute fluffy vermon the other day see photo below). Surely he could do this insey wencey task. That's when I heard the first dog laugh out loud ever.





So because I couldn't read, I cleaned the van. And after that I played Tetris on my phone. An hour later Matt came home and now all is well. Matt immediately had to leave to take Tobin to see WALL-E, they had a date. My training with Roscoe will continue, my next step is to teach him that what he kills needs to stay out of my house. I don't want to see anymore dead squirrels on our basement steps. But my discouragement is useless when Matt comes to Roscoes aid and demands that I take trophey pictures of Roscoes kill.

******WARNING DEAD ANIMAL PICTURES AHEAD*******

Really, really disgusting stuff....I know.

The I-don't-need-the-stress-of-a-birthday-party Post

I had a vision for the twins' second birthday party before they were born. When I can't sleep at night, I plan parties. It's cheaper then sleeping drugs but just as addictive. If I were to have two boys I decided to do a train themed birthday. The invitations would have steam coming out of the smoke stack saying, "Two, Two". For two girls I was going to have a ballerina "two two" (tutu) party. Boy girl twins was a harder theme to come up with. I decided on Noah's Arc, two by two. But on account that I have no home and we were leaving on a vacation the next morning I decided that a big party with a theme was mommy suicide. Instead we had a lovely day at Enchanted Forest. This hilly silly park was just perfect for giving the twins a fun celebration in honor of them and us surviving for two years.

We all headed to Red Robin for dinner and complimentary ice cream sundaes.

Rest up little girl, two is going to be hard.

Tree Huggers

Two X Two

What is it about your child's birthday that takes you right back to the day they were born?I know you've seen all the current Jabe and Phoebe pictures, so today I thought I'd show you a few from the day they were born.

The Oven

There have been many blessing that have come out of my infertility. Life lessons, patience in waiting, a strength in my marriage, but by far the best gift has been the raising of twins. I would have never, ever wished twins on myself. I mean the whole idea is rather absurd. These two have brought me so much joy. The kind of joy that makes me miss them when they are sleeping and happy to greet them in the morning.  

Happy Birthday Jabe and Phoebe. You and your big brother made all those years of sadness melt away. And you guys taught me that even the most scary task of having two newborns in the house...... wasn't so bad after all. 

 

Botox Gone Bad

Why babies and Botox don't mix.

I came across this picture of Jabe just minuets after delivery. Made me laugh. 

Home Secured By Taekwondo

So I've never given martial arts a second thought. Mostly I associate it with the instructor from Napoleon Dynamite.
But I was on a mission to find an activity that would be good for Tobin this summer. He was offered a free class in Taekwondo (or Twantaedo, as Tobin calls it) so we went and I watched to see if Tobin liked it. He was hooked right away. After only six lessons I can see a major improvement in Tobin's attitude, coordination (Tobin trips over air molecules......a few times a day.) focus, and esteem. He is required to do four chores at home daily with out being asked. Weekly he turns in his progress reports from home and school to make sure that he is behaving like a black belt in training. As a parent I welcome this new tool to use to motivate this little ninja to do what he is told the first time. And as a mom it melts my heart to see him focus on something for 45minuets and respond with, "Yes Sir!" after each command during class. So look out Rex Kwon Do, Tobin is moving in.

Master Graduate

It was hot and the ceremony was about to start. I saw some empty spaces way up in the cheap seats and knew that my mom would never be comfortable without a chair. I saw a row that was free but with a sign that said, "Reserved for President Guests" as I was reading it the usher asked if I was a guest of the president. I confidently said yes and my mother and I proudly took our comfy seats. I am ashamed.....not really. I have another confession to make. I was a little board listening to all the speeches and the name after name and blow horn after blow horn and the silly string.....my gosh. Anyway that's when I started people watching. I didn't have to watch far before I got my first good laugh. In front of me was a grandma and her preteenish grandson. He was looking on the stage at the hearing impaired interpreter. There conversation went exactly like this:
Grandson: "Grandma, is that lady doing sign language?"
Grandmother: "How the hell should I know."
Grandson: silent

Wow. I'm going out on a limb to say that this is the first graduate in that family.

Next I was drawn to a young 20 something man next to me who looked like he was just kicked out of the computer lab out into the sunshine for the first time. He solved his boredom from the ceremony by reading. Not just any book but, Demon Flower. A closer look showed me that it was a comic book. It must have been a good one cause he chuckled like we were watching a comedy act. I liked him so much that I took a picture of him for you.

Did you notice his rad hat? It has wings. Awesome.

Ok now for the real reason for this post. My little sister got her masters of education! Isn't she pretty?

With her daughter Mariko

With her husband Rhyan (who also graduated with this BA)

With my mom who got her though

Sunday House Update

So this house building is really getting exciting. We have most of our exterior bottom floor vertical walls up. This really helps my visual brain get excited about making this new place my home.

Tonight I just got back from taking my mom and sister on a tour of my lumber smelling, no walls house. They indulged me as I was trying to explain where we were standing and how I have been agonizing over what kind of bathtub I should get.

Here is a look at some of the progress.

I thought this would be a great picture of my shadow until I saw how flippin huge my torso and thighs look in this picture. On behalf of my hips and thighs can I just say that this angle misrepresents them. They thank you for not judging them.

In other exciting news we saw four deer in the front of our property a week ago. It's really fun to think of the wild life that we will soon be enjoying.