Dilemma

What do you do when you're at the park with TWO babies and there is only ONE infant swing?

Editors note: This brilliant idea has been brought to you by my husband Matt.

Free. A very good price

Tobin has forgone the few OPB shows that he watches for time looking out our window at the construction of a new church worship center. He is captivated by the large yellow equipment and the manly men who get to play in dirt all day. He taps at the window to get their attention. He asks me questions about names of the equipment that I have know idea about so I've made them up. Today after putting the twins down for morning naps we got busy making a lemonade stand to meet the workers and enjoy outside. I wasn't prepared to deal with money exchanges so Tobin and I decided FREE was a very good price. We had a blast preparing Styrofoam cups of refreshing beverages to the men in the mud pit. The foreman even took Tobin on a little tour of the equipment. He could not stop smiling.

Just start writing.

All of my writing teachers have given the advice that if you don't quite know what you want to say, just start writing. So I am taking that idea and hoping that the some sort of coherent train of thought will follow.
I'm in the market for a new Bible. Mine is from college and has been highlighted to death and has notes written in the margin with my college thoughts and color scheme for my wedding. I love reading The Message Bible but it's not great for studying. I also want something "grown up" that is leather bound. Anyone have any suggestions?
Speaking of suggestions, I am open to parenting advice regrading my almost eleven month old twins biting each other. Phoebe currently has three sets of teeth marks on her arm. But don't feel sorry for her because Jabe has two on his arm and one on each ear. I don't want to keep them separate all day cause I need them to play well together. Ideas?
I need new sheets for our bed. Notice I didn't say want new sheets. Matt pointed out to me that his side has a large hole in it. Any earth shattering finds in that department bloggers?
And lastly as I leave you with this post that really had no fluent thought or testament to my brilliant English professors so I give you a picture from mothers day. Tobin and his cousin Elsa on the farm.

A title earned

Mom. This Mothers Day I feel so worthy of the title. A title I have earned in so many ways. I know what it feels like to be utterly depleted of rest yet still be required to make coherent decisions. I know what it's like to need to turn on the car radio drowned out the noise of babies screams and toddler tantrums. I know what it's like to try to convince a three year old to just TRY a piece of corn. I know about changing a wet diaper and as I snap the last pant leg button to watch them poop. And poop. . . .there are too many stories and situations regrading poop. I know about the healing properties that a kiss has on a skinned knee and rocking the wounded repeating, "Mommas here, Mommas here." I know what it feels like to crowd with other parents waiting to pick up their babies from the church nursery. To see your babies face searching the mob for my familiar face; our eyes meet and they light up with joyful relief.
In the years that I tried and tried for the title of Mother, I didn't know that I would ever reminisce about the days when our house was quite and Cheerios didn't stick to the bottoms of my feet. But I admit sometimes I do. I also didn't fully know the satisfaction I would have crawling into bed at night, my body aching from the days worth of holding, cuddling, lifting, toy picking upping, wiping and changing. A day well spent. Happy Mothers Day to all you in the trenches with me and to all the pre-mothers out there who's heart are being prepared.

My sister Elisabeth, My niece Mariko, My mom Sharon, Phoebe Claire, Me

Ten Years Ago. . .

I didn't sleep well. My head and heart felt as if they may burst. I was happily anticipating my wedding day. I was newly twenty and my groom a strapping young man at nineteen. We had been dating for over three years and had "saved" ourselves for our wedding night. Looking back, would I have done things differently? YES! I would have said no to the floral patterned bridesmaids dresses, I would have chosen to put a tea cup with roses on the top of my cake, not the plastic heart with fake rose buds that the baker choose. I would have put a limit on my three hour receiving line. I would have told Matt not to invite the whole student body at our private college to our wedding via e-mail. I would have hired someone to video and a more creative photographer to capture my day. But that's about all the regrets I have. I would have married Matt all over again. and again and again. Truly quality men are as rare as the endangered snow leopard.

Matt, We had no clue what we were getting ourselves into, did we? I am so fortunate to be clueless with you. I am fully happy with our lives. I thank you for being such a kind, patient man. It is a joy to raise children with you and a privilege to share your name. Here's to fifty more.

Blog Fraud

I'm not very good at this. I mean I like blogging but I'm not as fancy as I'd like to be. I love living my day to day, normal life and looking for the nuggets that might make and interesting post. But most of all I blog because I am a miserable failure when it comes to my kids baby books. I suppose it's because on those types of memorabilia I think they have to be perfect. You know, like you have write all entries of milestones and immunization records with the same black pen with perfect penmanship. And that requires . . . a restful state of mind and hours of free time. Maybe in twenty years. So I love blogging. It's quick, easy and makes me feel that my kids might have some sort of account that they were loved and so on. But I am rather plain about the whole thing. I haven't the first clue how to add side bar lists of my favorite books or movie reviews. Although I love the creative blog designs out there, I use the functional yet overused template settings. I don't know how to add a link or even move a picture so it's not at the top of the post. "But" you say, "You have music". (May I take this opportunity to apologize to all the times when you've been up late and the house is quite and sleeping only to be jolted to the 'three little birds' song on my site.) Alas twas not me that figured out how to add music but my genius husband. I've been sick of the song for a long time but I have no idea how to get it off!!!! I have lately been in love with this new John Mayor song and at least had Matt change it to give you some variety while you race to turn down the volume. The other major issue I need to address is my lack of English skills. I feel I am a much better speaker then writer so I have always stayed away from this awkward communication. I have never formally been diagnosed with a learning disability but I live as if I know I have one. Spelling for me is an art form. Meaning people have to use interpretation to guess what I am trying to say. If it wasn't for spell check and my English major roommate, I would have never graduated from college. And it's not just the spelling but my grammar. It's like a cat climbing a fireman's pole. It's painful. I don't know how to use commas or quotes or accent marks correctly. Rather I guess and hope no one too critical is reading. So I thank you all you professors and homeschooling mom's, thanks for not correcting me in a comment. It would just leave me feeling like I was back in school again. I would get my papers back full of red marks with notes like, "great content and ideas but make sure you proof read." But I suppose I can comfort myself knowing that I provide you with charming pictures of my children.

Rubadub two babies in a sink?

Had to share!

Momma needs a diaper

I just polished off three, no four mini MilkyWays from Tobin Easter basket. All the kids are napping and I thought it was time to update the old blog. I just got back from Hermiston where I spent a few days with my dear friend Ang http://www.dailyditch.blogspot.com/ and her kiddo's. Matt stayed back to keep the money rolling in and I took all three kids on a three hour road trip. I know what you are thinking and your right, I am crazy. I timed the drive after lunch and during nap time. The plan was that the kids would sleep during the drive. Everything went well until of course my McDonald's Iced coffee (love them by-the-way) caught up with me and I had to PEE! What do you do with three sleeping children in the car? If I stop the car they will wake up and might realize that they have been strapped in the car for an uncomfortable amount of time; thus making the rest of the trip . . .um unpleasant. But as the feeling was getting more intense and the John Mayor CD stopped distracting me, I started to scheme. What if I stop at a rest stop and find a nice old lady to watch the van while do my thing? And then I was haunted by the reality of that little old lady kidnapping my children and . . . I knew that it was off the table. Could I brave waking them up, putting the babies in the stroller and trying to find a stall large enough to hold all of us? Then I imagined Tobin touching things and dealing with awake children blah....blah....blah... Other options: pulling over and squatting (too many what if's to write) or as inspired by the lady astronaut. . . Phoebe's extra diaper sitting next to me. It began to call to me. "You can do this." "You would feel so much better." "No one would have to know." You'll be happy to know that I dismissed this idea considering what this might look like to the truck driver next to me. So I bucked up a held it the rest of the way. I have no symptoms of any bladder infection and I lived. Applause Applause Applause. The things we do to avoid being stuck in a mini van with screaming children.

Easter was fun with my family. I made a chocolate trifle that was layered brownies, pudding, whipped cream, and crushed heath bar. Tobin helped me assemble it. We admired the creation and I asked Tobin what he thought of it. "It needs frosting." Man after my own heart.

I'm laying all the cards on the table

So I've shared about my addiction to sugar and I obviously have a hoarding issue with babies but here is a few more you might not know about. I chew ice. A few cups a day. I know what they say about ice crunchers and I am only willing to admit that yes, I probably am anemic. My other folly is. . . . buying baby clothes. I have gotten better since Tobin was a baby. Tobin, (now Jabe) has boxes upon boxes of clothes. Jabe will never come close to wearing all his hand-me-downs. And really, how do you pass up little girl clothes? Just to make my self feel better I should let you know that I never pay full price at stores like Gymboree or Janie and Jack. And I always look for bargains at Target and Wal-Mart. Sometimes I find the best stuff there. So I just have to show you my latest find on the clearance rack at Janie and Jack. These little boots will be perfect for fall.
I am also including some pictures of the twins first dip in the pool. Check out Tobin's water wings.

The last?

The twins turned nine months a few days ago. Phoebe is pulling herself up and doing some cruising. Jabe crawls like a robot wined-up toy. Today I introduced sippy cups. So many milestones I have crossed off their list already. Their birthday will be here before I know it. (Or want it.) I can't help but become emotional when I wonder , "will this be the last of my babies?". A part of me would be great if it is. A part of me morns for the future me who misses the weight of her own babies sleeping on her chest. Because I still have four frozen embryo's left out of my amazing batch of fifteen, I feel I am not allowed to look at Jabe and Phoebe as my last. I feel I still need room in my heart for one more frozen blessing. There is a greater then great chance that nothing will become of these last hopefuls. But until I know, I've saved all the clothes and the swing and the bouncy chairs. All stuffed in the attic wondering if they'll ever be used again.

A walk in the park

Flirting Tips from a 3 year old

So Tobin is drawn to a ten year old girl at my birthday party. He sits way too close to her and rubs her back. He gives her "bed room" eyes and says smugly, "I go poop in the potty". She inches away.

Sorry buddy. Better luck next time.

A few more

The best thing

The best thing about a funeral is being with family. We had relatives from California, Tennessee, and Washington. We all crammed into a little house at the coast and had a blast. The babies were held every moment (They are having a hard time adjusted today) and the music. Oh the music. Four guitars, a harmonica, a beer jug and a few singers (some better then others). So much fun during a sad time. Here are some pictures of my spectacular family.

Where to begin?

I've had blog topics rolling around in my mind for weeks now. The last funny story from Tobin, My thirtieth birthday that was fabulous and I was ridiculously spoiled. But today I must blog about my grandpa Earl. People say that girls "marry" their fathers. I didn't, I "married" my grandpa. He is a man that is as close to Christ as I have known. My grandpa has a way of loving and welcoming everyone he greats with a smile and his latest joke. He knows how to fix everything with duck tape and old plywood. He taught us all how to make whistles out of tree branches and to not be ashamed about giving old grandpa a kiss on the lips.
My grandma Barb and the love of his life, died just over a year ago. She was a queen to him. He showed us an example of long lasting commitment and unending love. I, nor my mom, ever remember him ever speaking an ill word about anyone. I just can't stress enough what a Christ-like life he has lead. He has been a pastor his whole life. And not just on Sunday mornings at the pulpit but his everyday comings and goings.
Most importantly to me. . . What I will cherish as simple as it is, Grandpa lights up every time he sees me. (to be fair he does this will all his grand kids) He made this awkward kid feel like a precious rare jem.
Last night I said goodbye to my beloved Grandpa Earl. He is dieing. If I were able to write a script for the best way to die I couldn't out do the perfect way God has designed for my grandpa. His death will not be a sudden, unexpected shock. His death will not be painful, long, burdening. His death is surrounded by loved ones. His legacy. His future. Some of us cousins had an incredible experience with him last night were he suddenly became alert and we surrounded him with stories of thankfulness and told some of his old jokes that made him smile. My cousin Jordan shared of their resent talks about how Jordan feels frustrated with the church today and it's sometimes hypocrisy and bureaucracy. Grandpa sympathised with him and said, "Jordan you can't change the church looking on the outside but must change it within." What wisdom. After we were done talking Grandpa simply muttered, "You are all special". Later all the family came in his room and my Uncle Phil led us in prayer. In the tearful silence after the amen Grandpa simply said, "Blessed."
Grandpa go to Jesus. Your glory awaits you.

I don't want to talk about it.

I know, I know. Its been a long time. We've been infested with colds, infections, and pink eye. Someone needs to carpet bomb our house. I really don't want to go into what the last three weeks have felt like. I don't want to remember the walks in the backyard in the middle of the night to get Phoebe to breath normally, I don't want to discuss hundreds of filled diarrhea diapers I've changed. I have no need to share with you the almost impossible task of eye drops three times daily for three children and one adult. I'd rather be silent about boxes of tissue we have used on snotty babies. Instead I'd rather talk about SPRING. Whatever magic happens when spring arrives and bakes all the germs and lawn mower start up and screen doors let fresh smells in stale houses. I am sooo ready for it.

Love Bugs

Happy Valentines Day

If He would have given me a choice.

So if last week God would have given me a choice if he could allow Matt to leave town for a week and give me and the kids a awful flu, I would have said, "HELL NO". So I guess that's why he didn't give me one. I would have told him that I was worried enough about having Matt gone all week and that I had plans. My MOPS group on Tuesday with a lunch with Julie, my long a waited visit with my dear friend Angela on Wednesday, my Thursday outing with my pregnant cousin Jill. I HAD PLANS. Well those changed Sunday night when Tobin woke up in a tub of puke and continued to puke and dry heave every half hour. By the mornings light Tobin had two baths, three jammie changes, my hall way, entryway, and bathroom had been moped, Tobin's sheets were changed, my sheet were changed and a pile of smelly laundry had stacked up and I was exhausted!!! And folks that's just the beginning. It's one thing to take care of sick children when you are healthy but when I started puking.... I got scared. So as I lay sweating and shaking and wanting Matt to be home so bad I could have levitated him home. (He was sick too by the way) I prayed more then once, God give me strength. And of course he did. Tobin bounced into my room that morning loaded with healthy energy and demanded breakfast. ( I wished I could make him into a thoughtful eleven year old who would have seen that I was sick and quietly slipped out of the room to make his own breakfast, but there he remained a helpless selfish three year old.) So I did something that I hate doing. I ASKED FOR HELP. I called my wonderful, gracious, beautiful mother-in-law who was already busy at work. She dropped everything and arranged for Tobin to go to his pre-school all day and helped me get the twins up and brought them for me to nurse. She stayed till noon and then came back after work and took Tobin home with her for the night. So here it is Friday, Matt is home and is almost better. I'm feeling better by the minuet and Tobin is well too. The twins on the other hand are just starting diarrhea. I am praying that they don't get as sick as we all were. For those of you still reading this post let me just say that although I would have never asked for this, I have gained confidence in me as a parent this week. I am stronger then I thought I was and I am so grateful for my support team in my life. I have a deep admiration for single parents. I was blessed by my MOPS group who dropped by crackers, 7up, Jello, and Soup. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. I am also just aware again that God cares more about our character than our comfort. I am grateful for my health now more then ever. Sorry for the long post but it's been a long week. Peace

Super bowl brothers

I have been looking forward to this years super bowl for a LONG time. Not because I enjoy the game although the commercials can be fun. But for one sole reason. Matching football sweaters from Gymbroee. Gotta love a mom who forces her kids to coordinate!

Is God the sun?

Everyone always says to write this stuff down so here it goes. . .

January 28th, 2007
Driving to my mom's home in Keizer
Tobin with the sun in his eyes: "Mom the sun is looking
at me. Is God the sun?"
Me: "No, God made the sun."
Tobin: "Where does God live?"
Me: "Heaven."
Tobin: "But where did he go?"
Me: "Well, God became Jesus and came to earth where we
live."
Tobin: "We're not in earth anymore right mom?"
Me: "Hun?"
Tobin: "We're in Keizer now."